If tomorrow never comes

If I knew it would be the last time that I'd see you fall asleep,I would tuck you in more tightly and pray the Lord, your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time that I see you walk out the door,I would give you a hug and kiss and call you back for one more.

If I knew it would be the last time I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,I would video tape each action and word, so I could play them back day after day.

If I knew it would be the last time, I could spare an extra minute or twoto stop and say "I love you," instead of assuming, you would KNOW I do.

If I knew it would be the last time I would be there to share your day,well, I'm sure you'll have so many more, so I can let just this one slip away.

For surely there's always tomorrow to make up for an oversight, and we always get a second chance to make everything right.

There will always be another day to say our "I love you's",And certainly there's another chance to say our "Anything I can do's?"

But just in case I might be wrong and today is all I get,I'd like to say how much I love you and I hope we never forget,Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, young or old alike,And today may be the last chance you get to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow, why not do it today?For if tomorrow never comes, you'll surely regret the day,That you didn't take that extra time for a smile, a hug, or a kiss and you were too busy to grant someone,what turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today, whisper in their ear,Tell them how much you love them and that you'll always hold them dear,Take time to say "I'm sorry," "please forgive me," "thank you" or "it's okay".And if tomorrow never comes, you'll have no regrets about today.

Author Unknown

Totally empty

That is the way I feel right now. Callie is at Mom's for the first time tonight without me. We have not been apart at night since she arrived 8 1/2 months ago. I knew it would be hard, but I didnt know how much it would open my eyes.

I guess with what happened in our family this week with Joey losing his baby really made me stop and thank God for giving Josh and I a healthy baby girl.

Our house is way too quiet and calm tonight for me. I would rather see toys all over the place, hear little goos, coos, and giggles. Go into her room and her lamp be on awaiting her to go to "night night". Tonight with our house seeming so EMPTY it has made me so much more thankful for the fact that I have a precious daughter that I can hold, rock, play with, and love on at any single minute. I could not imagine my life without my Cal Nae. I hope that I will always make the right choices, and be the best Mommy to her that I can be. I hope that in her future she and I will be as close and Mom and I are.

If I never succeed at anything else in life I hope that I succeed in Callie's eyes as being a good Mother.

So very true...

Excuse This House

Author: Unknown

Some houses try to hide the fact
That children shelter there,
Ours boasts it quite openly,
The signs are everywhere.
For smears are on the windows,
Little smudges are on the doors.
I should apologize, I guess,
For toys strew on the floor.
But I sat down with my child
And we played and laughed and read.
And if the doorbell doesn’t shine,
Her eyes will shine instead.
For when at times I’m forced to choose
The one job or the other,
I’d like to cook and clean and scrub,
But first I’ll be a mother.

Such a treat

So I have made a deal with myself to try to take a little more time for myself at least once a week. Tonight was my treat night. I took a 30 minute bath and read part of a great Mary Higgins Clark book (I love to read in the tub I would do it every night if I could), soaked in my rose petal bath things, re-polished my toenails, did a Cucumber peel off mask, followed by a great new face moisturizer and treated myself to lotion from head to toe. This was so super nice compared to my normal 3 minute in and out shower followed by a little deodorant and if I am lucky some body spray. I felt so energized right after my treat, but now am so relaxed and sleepy I can hardly hold my eyes open.

Off to bed for hopefully a good nights sleep......

How amazing it is

I know I always say that being a Mommy is the best thing that has ever happened to me. And well it is. Times like today I really have so many emotions they are hard to keep in. Last night Callie didnt feel too well or sleep well so she ended up in my bed. She is in the process of cutting 6 teeth at once and has been fine with it until yesterday. She went to the bathroom 8 times which is not normal at all for her. So we are playing on the floor on a blanket as much as possible in the birthday suit to get some air to her little booty. This is her first rash since she has been born.

All of that said to lead to this....this morning when I woke up she was laying there playing with my face and as soon as my eyes popped open there it was... the biggest, cutest, sweetest little smile I have ever seen. Still my favorite time is in the morning when I get that first smile of the day. It just melts my heart. I am so blessed that God allows such sweet little miracles to start a new day.

It's smiles like this one....

Went to Daddy's grave

Tuesday Mom and I went and stayed the night in Sheridan. Since we were at my house for Father's Day I wanted to take Daddy some flowers I had bought for Father's Day. So we went to clean up his grave and check on things. Well once we got there I got depressed at how empty it looked so we went shopping and I made two baskets and fixed a the vase Mom had taken him roses in for V-Day and took them back to his grave. Its amazing how quickly flowers fade in the sun. There was only one actual flower arrangement left on Daddy's grave because Mom and I had moved some one of Daddy's to Mary's grave the last time we were down there.

It helped a little. We talked about planting a Rose bush or two next year to add to it because Daddy loved Roses so much.

1st Happy and Sad Fathers Day

My 1st Easter


Last pic of Daddy & I together (7 months pregnant with Callie)

Happy because its Josh's first with Callie and sad because its my first without my Daddy.

I went to Wal-Mart to do my usual Father's Day card shopping and I could not bring myself to not buy my Daddy a card. The first one that caught my attention really fit once I read it. This is what it says:

When does a girl need her Dad?

She needs him when she's little...
to read her the bedtime story (and do the voices)....

to put her jammies on backward by accident (or maybe just to make her laugh)...

She needs her dad when she's growing...

to teach her to wait for a good pitch (and to be her biggest fan, hit or miss)...

A girl needs her dad when she's finally ready to set out on her own...

to change the oil and check the tires...

to hug her and tell her he knows she'll go far...

A girl needs her dad when she's not really a girl anymore...

to smile at her as they wait to walk down the aisle...

to look up to, no matter how grown-up she gets...

to read her kids a story (and do the voices)...

When does a girl need her Dad?

ALWAYS!!

I really still feeling like I need my Daddy.

A lot of these things really touch my heart. I miss my Daddy so much. I love you Daddy, Happy Father's Day!!